Where do I go from here?

The last 24 hours have been eventful. Not sure if I should classify the events as "fortunate" or "unfortunate". All I know is I feel like someone stomped on my heart. AJ and I have decided that for happiness sake, that we should not date any longer. I wish we could have been what each of us needed, but reagrdless of the efforts, the voids weren't filled and expectations were not met. AJ is a wonderful man and truly deserve someone that will be what he needs and make him happy. I want more than anything to remain his friend, and if that is all I can get, so be it.

Thanks to my very dear friend CA for being there for me, as usual. He has an uncanny knack of knowing when to call. I'm am closer to CA than any friend that I have. We don't talk as often as we would like or see each as much as we like, but despite the distance we both know what we mean to each other.

So the question is... "where do I go from here?"