" WE ARE FAMILY"

This year marks an important event for America. It is election year, just in case you haven’t noticed, however the last several years have been marked by politicians and religious leaders stepping up to the microphone and dishing out their rhetoric about protecting “family values”. Hence GW knucklehead proposed we amend the constitution to deny the right to marry to homosexuals in the name of protecting the “family”. So just what is family?

In my head I know what the term means to me, but I decided to dig a little deeper. First I turned to the good ol’ standby, Webster’s dictionary (correctly called the Merriam Webster’s in today’s world). 1: a group of individuals living under one roof and usually under one head : Household 2 a: a group of persons of common ancestry : Clan b: a people or group of peoples regarded as deriving from a common stock : Race 3 a: a group of people united by certain convictions or a common affiliation : Fellowship.

More research reveals that family has many definitions, due to the complexity of society. The true definition can depend on if you are trying to define family terms of economics, religious, psychological or medical, just to name a few.

Since I’m a medical guy, Medical.net defines family as: 1. A group of individuals related by blood or marriage or by a feeling of closeness. 2. A biological classification of related plants or animals that is a division below the order and above the genus. 3. A group of genes related in structure and in function that descended from an ancestral gene. 4. A group of gene products similarly related in structure and function and of shared genetic descent. 5. Parents and their children.

Many people say today that the family is an arbitrary cultural structure. As society changes, so does the family. In Biblical times, the family was a patriarchal clan - a man with his wives and concubines, and their many children. Through most of history, the family changed to encompass a monogamous couple raising their children.

However, in today’s society, ever influenced by technology and our ability to easily travel the globe and communicate with each other almost effortlessly, family has certainly evolved. Therefore a new definition is emerging "a group of people held together by bonds of love and affection." This definition encompasses a variety of family forms: a man and a woman, married and unmarried, with or without children, gay and lesbian couples, singles, with and without children, and even larger groups of individuals in various communal living arrangements. According to this view, what is important is not the actual family structure, but the quality of the relationships.

In fact if you look at the definition of family adopted by the National Institute of Mental Health in the 1990’s, family is defined as a “Network of Mutual Commitment”.

So back to the politicians and religious leaders who often define family only in “traditional terms” applying to heterosexual couple with children. In fact the Catholic Church gives very little recognition to the single parent family, even if the person is a heterosexual female, who has never married and has chosen to adopt. I personally reject that notion.

Growing up and coming out I realized that my family did not only consist of my parents and siblings. When I looked around I recognized my family as those with whom I have meaningful relationships. When I look at my friends and know that they would be there for me in a time of need, and I would do the same for them, that is family, perhaps extended family, but family all the same.

So while reading all these definitions and viewpoints, one of the most interesting definition I ran across was this: “The family is the natural and fundamental group unit of society and is entitled to protection by society and the State” (United Nations, 1948).